Cynthia Ann Matthew's

What a Grieving
Mother Really Thinks

Hello old friend,
Oh yes you know
I lost my child a while ago.

No, no please don't look away
And change the subject, It's OK.
You see at first I couldn't feel,
It took so long, but now it's real.

I hurt so much inside you see
I need to talk, come sit with me
You see, I was numb for so very long,
And people said, "My, She is so strong."

They did not know I couldn't feel,
My broken heart made all unreal.
But then one day, as I awoke
I clutched my chest began to choke,

Such a scream, such a wail,
Broke from me.. My child! My child!
The horror of reality.
But everyones moved on, you see,
Everyone except for me.

Now, when I need friends most of all,
Between us there now stands a wall.
My pain is more than they can bear,
When I mention my child, I see their blank stare.

"But I thought you were over it,"
Their eyes seem to say,
No, no, I can't listen to this, not today.
So I smile and pretend, and say,
"Oh, I'm OK"
.
But inside I am crying, as I turn away.
And so my old friend, I shall paint on a smile,
As I have from the start,
You never knowing all the while,
All I've just said to you in my heart.